Jeremy Marchant talks to Dave Harries
6: Stages of a business relationship
0:00 why don’t people succeed in building referral relationships?
1:48 Even when people are willing it still doesn’t work. Why? We develop business relationships the same way that we develop relationships outside business.
2:40 Stages though which a relationship goes
3:50 Time commitment in building a referral relationship
4:35 …back to the stages. Honeymoon stage
5:40 Story about the Honeymoon and using the next stage, Power struggle, to destroy the relationship
7:21 Power struggle stage
8:42 Dead zone stage
10:21 Dead zone is a trap
11:12 Getting out of dead zone—fear of the next step—need to commit
13:30 Partnership stage—more commitment
16:55 Leadership stage—‘Serve to lead’—politicians aren’t leaders
7: Dealing with the power struggle and dead zone stages
Follows on from episode 6, ‘Stages of a business relationship’
3:38 How these stages are structured
5:15 Positive/negative fight
6:12 Dependence/independence fight
7:16 Three ways through the power struggle
9:02 Showing the way
10:06 Transition to dead zone
10:49 Roles, rules and duties—way through
12:29 Competition—takes time, resources and effort from progressing the business—way through
14:38 Being stuck—Fear of the next step—way through
17:24 It’s not difficult and it won’t take a long time
8: What’s the point? Purpose and outcomes of networking
0:00 Purpose and outcomes model introduction
1:50 Purpose gives rise to outcomes―no purpose is wrong, but some are more useful
6:10 Actions—global purpose
8:45 Defining a useful purpose
10:35 Choice of purpose and outcomes—story of the election candidate
13:28 Is your purpose the first/most important thing to communicate?
14:57 Use of purpose to guide how you communicate with others, and to make strategic decisions
17:42 Tip on refining definition of purpose
9: How we process information and make decisions
People process information in four ways—thinking, feeling, knowing, sensing. It’s directly relevant to how we decide to network and, of course, is widely applicable in business and in life.
One point to aim for is that we should trust our intuition (‘knowing’ in this model).
0:00 Think/feel/know/sense model
4:35 Knowing (intuition)
6:08 Example of going to a restaurant
9:32 How to apply this model in business?—story of the father and three children
12:00 Giving a presentation
13:29 Are you at risk of being someone you’re not by seeking to modify your communication with others?
15:50 Trust your intuition (knowing)
0:00 Why leadership is helpful to networking
0:41 Serve to lead (Royal military academy, Sandhurst)
1:16 What does being ‘in service’ mean—and not mean?
1:41 Why is this useful in networking?
2:13 What do leaders do that people who aren’t leaders don’t so?—they create a facilitating environment
3:50 Leadership is showing the way
4:50 Example: story of charity CEO
6:55 Example: how Red Arrows debrief and admit errors
8:21 How this benefits networking and one’s networking group
9:39 The flip side—how politicians don’t adopt leadership positions—it’s not about telling people what to do
11:10 Women ought to better leaders than men
0:00 Malcolm Gladwell’s book, The tipping point, and its relevance to networking
1:00 Definition of connectors, mavens and ‘salesmen’
1:52 How to tell the difference
2:47 Applying these ideas to networking events—connectors
5:38 What if you are not a connector or a maven?—practise—become one—act as if
℗ 2018 . © 2019 Jeremy Marchant Limited . recorded 9 july 2018 . updated 14 may 2019 . image Dave Harries
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